We continue our series of tales from Sir Dickon, a 14th
Century Knight of the Realm, magically transported to the 21st
Century to become a modern-day life coach.
Anyone having a problem booking a doctor’s appointment at the moment?
Where are all the doctors? You might get the impression that they are all on an extended Coronavirus holiday 😷🌴😎.
In the 14th Century visiting the Doctor 👴 was a risky business. There was a good chance the prescription was more likely to poison, injure or kill you than cure you. 😥. Sir Dickon gives us an insight 👀 ;
Symptom - a headache 😈
Cure – Trepanation.
Headaches were caused by a demon trapped inside your head, rampaging around. The physician would drill a hole in your skull to let the demons out. Obvious when you think about it!
But how did the demon get
in to begin with?
Symptom – painful throat, stomach, chest, arse etc.
Cure – Blood letting.
The doctor would drain blood to
rebalance the fluids in your body. The blood loss caused the patient to become dizzy
and disorientated, generally forgetting why they were feeling unwell in the
first place 😵
Symptom – Syphilis, a common venereal disease.
Cure – quicksilver, better known as mercury was injected into your private parts. Interestingly
mercury did result in some initial improvement in the condition, until the
unpleasant side effects kicked in 😟
And finally …
Sir Dickon: “My wife has been nagging a lot lately. I think she might be a
witch”. 👵
Doctor: “We will have to run some tests. We will dunk her in
the village pond. If she floats it proves she is a witch and we’ll burn her at
the stake. If she sinks, she’s innocent”.
Sir Dickon: “How much do I owe you for this consultation”?
Doctor: “5 shillings”.
Sir Dickon: “Cheaper than a divorce”. 😁
